The Short Life Of The Lifetime Supply
One day, many years ago. In fact it was so long ago that I still believed that there was a president in the White House who isn't owned by "Them, Inc." So many years ago I still felt young. So many y... you get the drift. It was then that I was sold a "Lifetime's Supply" of Bic Lighters.
You know those nice comfortable Bic Lighters? The one's which fit right into your pocket and seem to last forever? Yes, the plastic giveaway things which come in so many colors. I love them. I believe the man who designed the things should be either given a medal for excellent design or burned at the stake for being in league with Satan... whichever.
So, as I was saying, there I was with my "lifetime supply" (actually only one gross (144) of the wee beasties) and it was a not inconsiderable amount. Of course they would have been used up in just a handful of years if I had continued to smoke but shortly after being given the lighters, I quit. I went from a two-pack a day habit to nothing and slugged it out with withdrawls towards freedom from nicotene. Yeah, good for me... but the point is that I ceased to use the lighters all that much. I would use them to light candles, occasional sticks of incense, other people's cigarettes, barbeques, etc. but these uses are not anywhere near the amount I used to use a lighter when I smoked. So I stopped using the lighters much. After 10 years or so, I was beginning to believe that it really was a "lifetime supply" of lighters. I started to give them away. I started to intentionally leave them in bars and at parties. I made a habit of lighting other people's cigarettes as a rule when in public. I wanted to be free of the things.
But then yesterday, I finished up using the last one. The pink Bic Lighter which had been sitting in my drawer finally refused to light. The last one was done. I was out of lighters and had FINALLY depleted that "lifetime supply" I sat in my room that evening feeling something missing from my life. One factor which had been a part of my existence was diminished. I told myself that it didn't matter. I had plenty of matches, books and books of the things. I really didn't need a lighter. But that pile of available lights had made my life feel more comforted, more secure and I was uncomfortable.
Irrational as I know it was, I still was not able to feel like matches could fill the void. Nothing will do but that plastic and metal ovoid cylinder of butane and flint. Nothing but a Bic will do.
I went out today and purchased four.
You know those nice comfortable Bic Lighters? The one's which fit right into your pocket and seem to last forever? Yes, the plastic giveaway things which come in so many colors. I love them. I believe the man who designed the things should be either given a medal for excellent design or burned at the stake for being in league with Satan... whichever.
So, as I was saying, there I was with my "lifetime supply" (actually only one gross (144) of the wee beasties) and it was a not inconsiderable amount. Of course they would have been used up in just a handful of years if I had continued to smoke but shortly after being given the lighters, I quit. I went from a two-pack a day habit to nothing and slugged it out with withdrawls towards freedom from nicotene. Yeah, good for me... but the point is that I ceased to use the lighters all that much. I would use them to light candles, occasional sticks of incense, other people's cigarettes, barbeques, etc. but these uses are not anywhere near the amount I used to use a lighter when I smoked. So I stopped using the lighters much. After 10 years or so, I was beginning to believe that it really was a "lifetime supply" of lighters. I started to give them away. I started to intentionally leave them in bars and at parties. I made a habit of lighting other people's cigarettes as a rule when in public. I wanted to be free of the things.
But then yesterday, I finished up using the last one. The pink Bic Lighter which had been sitting in my drawer finally refused to light. The last one was done. I was out of lighters and had FINALLY depleted that "lifetime supply" I sat in my room that evening feeling something missing from my life. One factor which had been a part of my existence was diminished. I told myself that it didn't matter. I had plenty of matches, books and books of the things. I really didn't need a lighter. But that pile of available lights had made my life feel more comforted, more secure and I was uncomfortable.
Irrational as I know it was, I still was not able to feel like matches could fill the void. Nothing will do but that plastic and metal ovoid cylinder of butane and flint. Nothing but a Bic will do.
I went out today and purchased four.
posted by S.A.M. Tanner at 2:07 PM
5 Comments:
aw... but is four really enough? LOL!
my last texas lighter is still holding up. I stopped smoking last week. My habit was about a pack every 4 days.
but i am not going to smoke anymore. even though i really want one right now...
;-)
Four?? You're not expecting to die next week, are you??
Man, I guess I missed my chance to get some of that action.
I hope that "lifetime supply" wasn't some kind of monkey's-paw deal, where you run out and then you die or something. Because that would suck.
Myself, I carry a Zippo. And I've never smoked in my life. I just think it's a cool little object ...
Steph... the four is the start of a "NEW" lifetime supply...
Brian... I've got a zippo too... but no fluid... funny about that.
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